19 Signs Your Cat Is Secretly Plotting Against You

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Cats are such mysterious little creatures, aren’t they? I adore their independence and quirky personalities, but sometimes, I can’t shake the feeling that my cat might be up to something. Sure, they’re cute and cuddly (most of the time), but every now and then, I catch them doing something that makes me wonder if they have their own secret agenda. If you’ve ever had that same sneaking suspicion, I’ve rounded up 19 signs that might just confirm your cat is plotting something behind your back.

They Knock Things Off Shelves for No Reason

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It’s not an accident. If your cat deliberately swipes at items until they crash to the ground, it’s a classic power move. They want to remind you who’s in charge of the household.

Staring at You for Extended Periods

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When your cat sits across the room and just stares without blinking, it’s unsettling. Are they plotting? Calculating? It’s impossible to tell what’s going on in their furry little head.

Random Attacks on Your Feet

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If your cat pounces on your feet as you walk by, they may be testing your reflexes. It’s like a drill, making sure you’re not too complacent.

Sudden Sprints Around the House

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These “zoomies” aren’t random—they’re training exercises. Your cat is perfecting their escape routes or practicing hunting maneuvers, all under the guise of playful running.

Sitting in Strategic High Places

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Cats love to perch in high places where they can observe everything below. They’re not just enjoying the view—they’re surveilling their territory, planning their next move.

Knocking Over Your Drinks

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Your cat doesn’t just “accidentally” spill your water. They’re reminding you that they control not only your space but also your sustenance.

Blocking Your Path

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Have you ever noticed your cat purposely positioning themselves in doorways or hallways? This isn’t just a random lounging spot—they’re strategically placing themselves to control your movement.

Ignoring You When You Call

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When your cat completely ignores you despite clearly hearing their name, it’s a power play. They’re letting you know that they’re above your commands.

Refusing to Let You Sleep

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Waking you up at odd hours, walking on your face, or knocking things over while you’re trying to sleep might seem like playful antics, but it’s more likely an attempt to keep you tired and weak.

Following You Around

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It might seem like your cat is just being affectionate, but following your every move could be a subtle way of keeping tabs on you at all times.

Bringing You “Gifts”

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When your cat delivers a dead bird or mouse, it’s not always an act of love. It could be a warning—”this could be you.”

Sitting on Your Laptop or Work

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Is your cat always walking on your keyboard or sitting on your papers? It’s sabotage. They’re making sure you can’t get anything done.

Staring at Nothing (or So You Think)

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When your cat stares off into space, you might think they’re just being weird. But what if they’re communicating with the unseen or plotting something only they can understand?

Playing with Your Hair

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It might seem cute when your cat bats at your hair, but don’t be fooled—they could be assessing your weaknesses.

Luring You in with Cuddles

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Ever notice how your cat seems sweet and affectionate one minute, then bites or scratches you the next? It’s a tactic to keep you on edge, never letting you get too comfortable.

Destroying Furniture with a Smug Look

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Your cat doesn’t scratch the couch because they need to. It’s because they want to. That smug look after they shred your favorite chair? Pure malice.

Attacking at Random

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Ever been petting your cat and, without warning, they lash out? This unpredictable behavior is a psychological tactic to keep you on your toes.

Eating Your Plants

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Your houseplants are not safe. Your cat isn’t just curious—they’re asserting dominance by destroying your beloved greenery.

Biting When You’re Almost Asleep

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When you’re just about to drift off, your cat bites you. It’s the perfect way to keep you from feeling too secure. They want to make sure you never truly relax.

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Chantile has been obsessed with logic puzzles, jigsaws, and cryptograms since she was a kid. After learning she was taught how to play chess wrong by a family friend (so they could win), she joined her school chess club and the rest is history.

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